it has been hard the last few days not hearing from ripu. i miss him so much and everyone around me laughs and jokes about him probably not coming or him not showing up. i smile and try to laugh it off but the truth is that it hurts. i have a hard enough time dealing with my own head but when they add to my trust issues i feel like running and hiding. not in the figurative sense, but the they just keep pushing and i look at airplane tickets to anywhere. but then he calls and all the bullshit washes away. all the hurt and pain of my day is gone and i am left with peace, lol even if pj and i are fighting.
i am a better person with pj. he pushes me to be better, and i push him to follow his dreams.
oh P.S. i feel like i am getting closer to the person that i want to be. i have come so far. (i know that i have a long way to go, but i am so proud of me... :)
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